I’m Too Considerate

Emily Teterud – Associate Marketing Director

I like to keep it real with you guys in these blogs, even when it reveals some ugliness in my life I need to work through. So, I hope you bear with me and maybe find something relatable. It’s my goal to share things that affect me in a real way so we can find common ground and be honest about different issues that are easy to keep inside where they are safe and undisturbed. That being said, I want to talk to you about motives.

Sometimes I joke with my dad about how being a good person bites you in the butt in this world. When you think about it…it’s kind of true. When you choose to go out of your way to do thoughtful things for people, when you bend over backwards to make sure others have what they need, it can go terribly wrong for yourself. Being an A+ student in consideration allows you to see its absence in others very easily. If you relate to me in the least, you might understand the feeling of wanting the same level of consideration returned and not getting it…at least to your standards.

Have you ever been in a situation of silent judgment when someone is not grateful enough for the amazing gesture of friendship you just showed? Or have you ever felt bitterness creep in when you realize no one is or ever will be as caring and considerate as you, and that’s just how life is? *dramatic sigh

You guys. Typing this out is so embarrassing because it’s absolutely ridiculous, and it’s exactly how I feel on a regular basis. I started thinking the other day about why I do things for others. What is my motive for the ways I push myself to be a good friend, a good employee, a good daughter or sister? I think it’s a mix, and I don’t get it wrong all the time! Phew. But I mess up enough to address the problem so I can get better. When I feel the attitude of bitterness coming, I know that my motive must be in the wrong place. Am I truly wanting to do something kind for someone? Or am I really needing affirmation or validation in some way to make myself feel better and to build myself up? It’s an interesting thought. It’s also interesting to read about motives in the Bible. Guess what? NONE of them talk about building yourself up and doing things for your own personal gain.

He restores my soul; He guides me in the paths of righteousness For His name’s sake. Psalm 23:3

Whether, then, you eat or drink or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God. 1 Corinthians 10:31

Whatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through Him to God the Father. Colossians 3:17

Whoever speaks, is to do so as one who is speaking the utterances of God; whoever serves is to do so as one who is serving by the strength which God supplies; so that in all things God may be glorified through Jesus Christ, to whom belongs the glory and dominion forever and ever. Amen. 1 Peter 4:11

All the ways of a man are clean in his own sight, But the LORD weighs the motives. Proverbs 16:2

Ok so let’s not end this blog by all feeling crummy about how terrible our selfish hearts can be with motives. Even though I think it’s good to confront the issue, I don’t think God wants us to feel miserable. He didn’t completely wipe our sin slate eternally clean for us to sit and be sad about how we mess up. Here’s a good tip for each of us that feels this way: If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.

It’s a new day. Let’s go be caring and considerate to others, not so that we will feel that way in return, but so that we can show people a reflection of how Jesus has changed us. Because the truth is, we have every reason to feel that way in return every second of every day. Reality check—none of us compares to the supernatural consideration of Jesus Christ who stooped down from His absolute perfection to enter our mess of a world and love us and save us. So, I wonder if it feels like a slap to His face when I complain about not feeling cared about. And I wonder if He (lovingly) rolls His eyes when I think of myself as the most considerate person ever. You guys, He might even chuckle when He sees me acting this way, who knows!

I’m just so grateful for a God who loves me in the midst of my petty, selfish, internal tantrums. He also gently corrects me and reminds me who He is to help me understand who I should be, which is considerate of others.

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I’m Too Considerate

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About The Author
- I am the programming coordinator at Central Christian Church AZ. I also moderate the Central Teaching Blog. If you have any questions, feel free to ask!